- 14 Mar, 2021
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- 6 Mins Read
with and Elder
family. Do not interview someone who is an assisted living arrangement or long-term care. Begin a dialogue to understand life from the perspective of the interviewee.
Before the interview, ask yourself what your attitude is about aging? Are you looking forward to being over 65 years? Why or why not? What do you see are the advantages and disadvantages to being old?
My attitude about aging is anxious and nervous, all at the same time. Anxious because I feel as if though that is a big accomplishment in life nowadays. People are dying so young, some due to natural causes and others could be because of violence. Nervous because I’m curious to know how humble I would be knowing that I’ve made it that far. I want to know how wise I would be, how knowledgeable I would be, and what I can pass on to the young generation that needs guidance. So yes, I am looking forward to aging, but aging gracefully. My advantages would be me receiving retirement after being in the workforce for so long. Enjoying waking up and spending my days stress free and loving on my family and friends. Disadvantages could be me now being able to do for myself and having to learn how to accept help from others. And what if my memory is not as good as I hope it would be, so now I am forgetful at times? That would probably cause me to forget the memorable moments I have of my loved ones.
Interviewee: JM
Age: 74
Where do I know her from: I met her at my job, she is a frequent shopper (Atlanta, Ga)
1. Begin by asking what the interviewee likes best about being at an older stage of life.
• JM enjoys the luxury of her family honoring her as the peace maker of the family
• They (family) respect her and never oversteps their boundaries
• Allowed to coordinate the family reunions and keep the traditions going like it always has been
• The healthcare benefits
• Free coffee at dinner (local)
• Able to sing with the church choir every Sunday
• Attends bible study every Wednesday
• Volunteers at other local churches just to put smiles on others’ faces
• FREE stuff/ senior citizens discounts at restaurant
• That overall feeling like “she made it”
• Doesn’t worry much about ways of life
• Spending time with loved ones
• Traveling
• Bingo nights
2. Is being older what the interviewee expected? Why or why not?
Definitely expected to get older, especially due to her parents living to be 90 years old with minimum health issues. JM still has family members (2 aunts) that are over the age over 100 years old. JM doesn’t feel like she’ll be leaving this earth any time soon, but is prepared mentally and spiritually to go whenever GOD says it is her time.
3. What physical changes due to aging are most troublesome? Any welcome changes?
Physical changes due to aging for her just consists of a little weight gain and high blood pressure. She says that she learned to enjoy the curves (As she smiled gently while rubbing her hips and legs). Says it gives her husband something to look at and rub on while they dance. And she began maintaining her high blood pressure with an old folks remedy by eating a celery stick a day.
4. Have there been any changes in relationships with spouse, friends, and children because of advancing age?
She met her husband 36 years ago and they have one child together. She had a daughter from a previous relationship and had never been married before, unlike her husband who had 3 children that he shared with his ex-wife. Surprisingly, JM and her husband have been married for only 5 years, but has been carrying his last name since 1985. One day, JM said that her husband came into the house and told her to put on some clothes because they were going to the courthouse to get married. JM said she had no objections and why not since it wouldn’t change anything. She says that some of her family never knew they weren’t married, so when she gave them a call, they were shocked and wondered why they were never married. Her husband says that he realized that he never wanted to leave this earth without JM being his wife. They still have the same loving relationship they had before the marriage. She couldn’t think of any negative situations that has cause loved ones to change as they aged. If anything, by her getting older, the children began to check on her more often and tries their hardest to spend as my time at her house than ever before.
5. How is getting older different for the interviewee than for his/her own parents or grandparents?
JM says that it is different because now this world is filled with even more technology that catches all kinds of illnesses. Her parents lived much different being that they had 12 children. They worked harder to get things they needed for their family and maintain life. Her father built their home on less than a half acre of land that he was given. The house was small and barely holding up at times, but they made it work. JM was the youngest of the 12 children, but got treated just the same. Her mother didn’t work because she had to take care of the house. JM didn’t have that luxury and she didn’t have that many children, so life was completely different. She was able to travel more and enjoy life a little more. JM says she appreciates her mother and father, but that wasn’t the life that she wanted to live. She wanted more freedom and equal rights. And that’s just what she got. Her and her husband worked and contributed to their lifestyle. But she feels like that is what kept her going all of her life. JM retired and still volunteers at church and sometimes at the elementary school across the street from her home. She feels as if she aging just as graceful as her parents.
In your paper discuss:
6. Was your interaction with an older person as you expected?
Just as expected. I like how she accepts the world that she lives in and never strayed away from what she felt that she wanted to do. Some fall into the roles and forget about themselves. JM made reminds me of myself, full of energy, loves to be around people, on the go all of the time, and never gives up. Her family reminds me of my family, so I think I’ll be living a long life.
7. Did you notice any physical or social changes related to age that the interviewee did not discuss?
I noticed how she carried this purse and was extremely heavy. Like it was full of bricks, but she didn’t struggle holding it on her shoulder. I asked what did she have in there that she desperately needed, she said she had everything she needed just in case she or someone else needed anything. I didn’t want to disrespect her by telling her that may not be healthy for her back, but she beat me to it by saying “I know, I know…it’s too heavy for me to be carrying around, but I just have to have my purse”
8. Did your opinion of elders change in any way after the interview?
Nothing changed about my opinion of elders. I just love their wisdom and advice about life. Talking to JM was encouraging.
5/10sw//Reviewed5/12sw